Searchfortreasure's Blog

…a Bible student's notes…

I apologize….

Just on the way to bed tonight and it dawns on me (NOT Morning!) that some folks get this blog by email and may not have been informed the results of my surgery. ( Well….I was “drugged,” ya’ know.)  The “mass” was benign.  I hope I wake up soon!  🙂  It is a wonder that the group that came by to see me off to surgery didn’t get thrown out.  Bob has counted 17 on his fingers and toes that were there at one time or another – noisily there.  They all got tired and left before I was dismissed except our son and his wife.  The surgery only took two hours, but it took me 5 hours to “pee” afterwards.  I couldn’t leave until I had made a stream.  I drank two Sprites and a Coke and was still on IV.  I walked, with Bob carrying my tubes, I drank, I sat on stool with water running in sink.  Nothing.  Then I decided to take my Coke cup and put warm water in it and pour it down my back to get my own stream going.  Turns out – didn’t have to – AHHHHhhhh……

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March 22, 2011 Posted by | Fun at the Hospital | Leave a comment

I almost got arrested before going to surgery!…

Or, at least subpoenaed….

There are 8 women with my name on the hospital’s list of patients.  I had been told by the office that called me the day before surgery to inform everyone I met of this fact – very sternly( not her “exact” words).  One of these Mary Pattersons was even born in my same year.  They have confused our heart tests, sent knee replacement surgery info to my urilogist, for two years I received another MPs bill as she made monthly statements and another one had collectors calling me for furniture I had not paid for at Sterchies.  

So, obedient as I am – I am overheard telling my surgery nurse this fact.  In the meantime, “Susan” had been sent to my room to “cheer” me with positive thoughts – like, “let’s just think positive.”   That goes against the grain of my Bibically- correct obedience to “think on these things” in Phillippians.  But, “miss sunshine” becomes adamant upon hearing that I have “divulged” private information and “broken the law!”

“WHO GAVE YOU THAT INFORMATION!!”

“I’m not telling!”

(Quite frankly, I don’t know the girl’s name.  It was a few years ago.  And, I wasn’t going to tell anyway.)

Being in the helpless position of lying naked, tubes in my arteries, and dried-out mouth, I just cried on, silently.

And, our daughter, JOY’s last words to me before I might die – “Be thankful you are about to go under”  – or something like that.  (When she gets back from a wedding in south GA, I will ask her.)

Now, that REALLY CHEERED ME UP!  And, kept me from being arrested for murder.  🙂

March 19, 2011 Posted by | Fun at the Hospital, Newsy News & Random Thoughts, The Funnies | Leave a comment

Fun at the Hospital….

I learned that hospital employees take patients seriously, but still ask questions that are meant to have “pat” answers:

“Hello, Mrs. Patterson, how are you?”  (Uh, I am in the emergency room, painfully pacing and praying.  How are you?)

So, for a while I used, “I was fine, but I got over it.”  (smile)

By the time I went to surgery, I was tired of that one.

Surgery nurse.  I was literally prepped for surgery and she says: “Hello, Mrs. Patterson.  How are you?”

“Well, I have two ingrown toenails on my big toes.” 

“Oh, I am so sorry.”  Then while putting on my hosiery, “yes, I see your ingrown nails.  You may need to see a doctor.”

The only thing they can do is put me to sleep.  I asked what they used.  It was Michael Jackson’s sleep drug of choice.  No comment.

Then, there is Patty – the RN in training.  “Good afternoon, Mrs. Patterson.  I have your Euroblue.”

“What’s it for?”

“Bladder spasms.”

“Oh, is my bladder in spasms?”  (Did they know something I didn’t?)

She hands it to me in the little cup.  I take a look.  Hand it back.  “I don’t take blue pills.”

I thought I saw some facial expressions that said, “Oh, what do I do now?”

“Why don’t you take blue pills?”

“Because they  usually have aluminum in them.  Sometimes it is called ‘blue lake 40. My father had early onset Alzheimer’s and I avoid aluminum.  But, I will take this if you will find out the inactive ingredients.”

“Uh, how do I do that?”

“On that teenie, tiny print on the little note usually stuck on the bottle.”

She came back later and proudly announced she had called the pharmacist, he read the paper, no aluminum.  I took the pill.

My favorite CNA was Avida.  She sang or hummed as she went about her chores.  I asked her to sing for me and she burst out with something I cannot remember.  She reminded me of Susan Boyle.  I found out she could play the harmonica, so she brought it my last day and played and I doe-se-doed in the hallway with my RN.  Avida volunteered to come to my aid every time I buzzed for help.  A nurse told me that she told everyone at the nurse’s station not to worry about 416, she would get well on laughter.

I had a great time, hardly any sleep, and hugs abounded.  Every staff member was efficient and kind.  And, if you need an iv inserted, request Tony.  He is very, very good.  I do not have one bruise from his insertion.

Fun at the hospital – but I don’t want to go back.

“Father, that is just a suggestion.  If you will, I will go back.  You know my heart.  I love You.  Thank You for taking such good care of me.”

July 30, 2009 Posted by | About, Fun at the Hospital, Kidney stone, Newsy News & Random Thoughts | Leave a comment

   

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