Searchfortreasure's Blog

…a Bible student's notes…

A room of my own….

Conversations with my GRANDDaughter, part 24…
I don’t how old I was when grandma moved out of our house into a duplex she built on the little hill above us. She built it as a duplex so she could have people on the other side of the wall that she might need in an emergency. After she died, mom pulled back the curtain a little on the window where she could view our house and the wallpaper was worn clear through to dry wall. She had been our “watcher.”
So – what’s this got to do with being 16? It was about then that I was given a room of my own – grandma’s former bedroom. It had its own entrance from outside and a little porch and, its own bathroom with room for a vanity with side mirrors. The closet was rather large for a house that was built that long ago – 64 years ago. It jutted out the side of the squarely-built house so that when I was sitting at that desk writing my mystery stories, I could view much of the whole yard – the swing that hung between two trees and on down to the bar-b-Que pit area, another swing, and permanent marble slab table. (We had lots of parties there. It was level. Dad had built the old-fashioned fire pit and two horseshoe setups – one for children and one for adults. Where were the mosquitoes back then?
Ahhh…my own room. My sister was four years younger than I and that had been okay, but we didn’t have a lot in common back then. She still remembers vividly when mom took her shopping for her own clothes because she had always worn my hand-me-downs. I had not even realized that. Four years is quite a spread when one is 16 and the other is 12.
Uh, oh, a room of my own to keep clean. Mom was ashamed of me. I would take off my clothes and lay them across a chair, so that on Saturday, one could tell what I had worn all week. Monday was on the bottom, etc. We did not waste water and time on washing clothes daily. I took off what I had worn to school when I got home and it just needed hanging back up most of the time. Only I did not hang – but I did lay neatly on the chair. Mom decided to embarrass me by inviting one of my teachers over to eat in the dining room. The door to my room was off the dining room and one could see into my room. It didn’t work. (Mom was into shame. For her, it was a big motivator; I did not let it change this “messy” room; but I did let it affect my heart. It is the parent’s job to “gain” a child’s heart for motivating, not shaming it. My dad had my heart and I believe to this day, that if he has told me to hang up my clothes, I would have – but he did not cross mom – she ruled. There is a Heart that you must seek – one like David’s in the Bible. He was a man after, seeking, God’s Own Heart.)

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August 1, 2011 - Posted by | Conversations with my GRANDdaughter

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